Wonderful Wednesdays

It's wonderful to grow up and realize that age doesn't matter when it comes to friendship.

I am blessed to be able to spend every Wednesday afternoon from 1:30 to 3:00 with these two beautiful women, among others. Several months ago, we started a Relief Society study group for anyone who felt like they would like a little more gospel discussion between Sundays ... kind of like a bridge to facilitate friendships and testimony-strengthening until we could meet back together again with our ward family.

Our Relief Society president extraordinaire organized this little group to meet at my home, and after three months of faithful Wednesdays, we all make sure to schedule everything else around this sacred little block of time.

The two women pictured above hardly knew each other when we started. Now, they are fast friends, trading varieties of oatmeal, teasing each other, and carpooling to our meeting. I love the sunshine behind them in the photo ... or is it sunshine??! I think they each may be masquerading angels.

The full-time missionaries come too, prepared with a little lesson from the Gospel Principles book. They present just enough so that we all feel comfortable asking questions, sharing personal experiences, and bearing our testimonies to each other of the different things we're learning about. Let me tell you, my family room has become holy ground on Wednesday afternoons. The Spirit is present without a doubt.

Today, we had a sweet older woman who is investigating the Church attend. She knocked at my door at 1:30 on the dot, armed with her new Book of Mormon, a paper of handwritten questions, and a big smile. The rest of us were converts as adults, and it was heart-warming to see each person take our new friend under her / his wings and help teach from the stories of their own conversions.

We have one elderly man attend! I had to get down on my belly and fish his hearing aid out from under his chair, but don't let that fool you. He seemed to be talking directly to Heavenly Father when he opened our meeting with a prayer, and he always senses the perfect moment to raise his index finger and bring the gospel message home.

A tender mercy for me: a lovely friendship with both of these sweet and feisty gals in the photo above. We now throw our arms around one another when we see each other, and they never leave me without a solid kiss on my cheek and an "I love you!"

Wednesdays have become my favorite day of the week.

Filling My Shelves

Confession: I am a little bit obsessed with Amazon books. Now that Lindon Bookstore (our town's cozy little gathering place for bibliophiles) is a distant memory, and the next closest Borders has closed its doors for good, I have been forced to do my book shopping on-line. I dragged my feet for a couple of years, not wanting to contribute in any way to the difficulties small bookstores were having. But finally my conclusion: a girl's got to read!

I have discovered, perhaps ten years after most, that within a New York minute I can hop on to Amazon, throw a couple of already-thought-about books into my virtual "cart", click-click-click as a returning customer, and those wonderful reads are on their way to my doorstep. No gas to drive 30 minutes to a shopping area, free shipping if I spend $25 (I always wait to order until I qualify for this), and my desired titles are always in-stock.

(Sidenote: what about the library, you ask?? I am a card-carrying member, and LOVE our local library -- I have been known to go there just to kill time between carpools by perusing the shelves -- but there are certain books that I just know I want to own.)

My last Amazon delivery is shown above. Do you ever suddenly start hearing about something new from several sources, and it gets you wondering if there's a purpose behind it, if you're supposed to investigate that thing? That's what happened with Joanna Brooks' new memoir, "The Book of Mormon Girl".

I never watch late night TV, but happened to have it on recently while I was working on a project, and Joanna was a guest on the talk show. I listened and simultaneously rolled my eyes thinking, "Great, another Mormon feminist with funky ideas", and dismissed it. Then the next night, Joanna was spotlighted on Rock Center's special on Mormonism, my ears perked up, and I paid a little more attention. When I saw an article online about her the next day, I took it as a sign and penciled her book onto my To Buy list. I'm glad I did, and I'll tell you why soon.

Then, my friend Logan shook us all by our virtual shoulders on Facebook a couple of weeks ago, touting Clayton Christensen's (of Harvard Business School) new book "How Will You Measure Your Life?" as one we must absolutely read. That was enough for me! I love a book recommendation from a trusted source. I added it to my list, bought both books at 30% of retail, got the super saver shipping, and it was a done deal.

I closed the back cover on "The BOM Girl" at midnight last night, and dove into "HWYMYL?" today. I'm already underlining like crazy and seeing perfectly-timed parallels with some things going on in my life. Oh, good stuff it is. Some people like to indulge in clothes or trips or gear or home decor. Me, I love to add a new great book to our living room library.

Yes, when those tight little boxes from Amazon show up on my porch, it is more exciting than an unexpected delivery of flowers or even a plate of cupcakes. (!) Book reviews to follow!

Write it Down!

It has been said that writing down a goal or an aspiration -- committing it to paper -- greatly increases one's chance of achieving that goal. I believe this!

Several days before the start of the new school year, my husband and I invited our daughter to go out for a nice dinner at her restaurant-of-choice. She chose Bahama Breeze, based solely on the fact that they offer a tropical smoothie that she adores. We told our daughter that the purpose of the dinner was to talk about her upcoming semester (her first in high school), to understand what she wanted to achieve in the different areas of her life, and to help her capture those dreams on paper.

Over house salads with pineapple vinaigrette and toasted pumpkin seeds, we asked her to brainstorm with us as to her different roles that she feels are important in her life. She came up with things like "student", "athlete", "daughter", and "sister". We suggested that she also fills a role at church as "first counselor in the MiaMaid class presidency", as a "friend", as an "individual", and as a "daughter of God".

After she decided on her specific roles that she wants to focus on, we suggested she list them in order of importance. We asked questions like, "Is being a soccer player as important as being a friend?", "Is being a friend as important as being a sister?" and "What do you think is the most important role you have?" We explained that with a very busy schedule, there would often be times when she would have to choose between "good, better, and best", and that it might be helpful to have already decided what her "non-negotiables" were, or what was "best" if she only had a small amount of time.

As she savored her main course, we encouraged her to set a goal or two under each role, something that she would love to be able to accomplish by Christmas. We talked with her about goals that were specific and attainable (a certain grade point average, a weekly letter to her sister), versus others that were too broad or difficult to quantify ("work on Personal Progress", or "get in great shape"). She reworded some things so that her own goals were measurable.

The idea of creating her semester in her head and heart in advance is that it encourages her to be constantly working toward excellence within a balanced life. Rather than just succeeding in soccer at the expense of everything else, wouldn't it be amazing to be able to have success in each of the important areas of her life??!

Tonight, she is going to type up her goals and print them out, and then we will encourage her to hang them on her bedroom wall where she will see them each day. Here's hoping that her first high school semester is memorable and is a great success!

For the Love of Addie

Here are eight things I'm loving about my five month-old granddaughter, Addie:

1. Her wide-open, gummy (except for two adorable bottom "toofers") smiles that come one right after the other.

2. Her bright eyes that are constantly taking in EVERYTHING around her. We laughingly and constantly say that she is "verrry advanced" and oh, so smart!

3. Her swoop of red hair that her mommy clips up girl-style with grosgrain ribbon clips.

4. Her soft little body in my kitchen sink, constantly in motion as I bathe her. She is learning to feel comfortable in her skin and seems fascinated and thrilled with the things she's learning to make it do.

5. Her intent focus on my eyes as she jibber-jabbers what I'm sure is very important stuff. Her changing facial expressions make us think she knows exactly what she's saying.

6. Her sweet little face, complete with respectable double chin, extra-long eyelashes, and red eyebrows ... perfect in every way.

7. The way she gets completely and utterly still when I hold her and whisper long secrets into her little ears.

8. Her chubby bare feet, always pushing, kicking, lifting to her hands, and sometimes even crossing at the ankles in ladylike fashion. (see photo above)

I Know the Scriptures are True

Our family is engaged in a full-court-press to finish reading the Book of Mormon together by our upcoming Stake Conference on September 23. We will have had six months to complete this challenge issued by our stake presidency, and we are really pushing to get 'er done, to wit, ten chapters out loud tonight.

We "lived" the first chapters of Third Nephi, collectively recoiling as we read about the evil Gadianton robbers going to battle (in blood-dyed lamb-skin about their loins, shorn heads etc.), and rejoicing as the righteous Nephites and Lamanites banded together to defend themselves, victorious because they turned to the Lord for the ultimate protection. The account of the earth's convulsions at the time of the crucufixion of Jesus Christ was particularly vivid tonight and led to a little discussion with a couple of personal "lightbulb" moments.

We pounded out our chapters with each of us reading five verses at a time. Our oldest daughter is home with her little Sweet Pea for a day, and her grown-up, educated insights made me sit up and listen. Our fourteen year-old earned a gold star for simply staying awake on the heels of last week's soccer tryouts.

We each have our preferred form of scripture, as is evidenced above: two ipads, the Book of Mormon for Latter-day Families (complete with pictures and definitions), and my old-school, hammered, marked-up, large-type, rained on, beloved copy. Whatever our individual copies of the Book of Mormon look like, we as a family testify of the following:

"I feel certain that if, in our homes, parents will read from the Book of Mormon prayerfully and regularly, both by themselves and with their children, the spirit of that great book will come to permeate our homes and all who dwell therein. The spirit of reverence will increase; mutual respect and consideration for each other will grow. The spirit of contention will depart. Parents will counsel their children in greater love and wisdom. Children will be more responsive and submissive to the counsel of their parents. Righteousness will increase. Faith, hope, and charity—the pure love of Christ—will abound in our homes and lives, bringing in their wake peace, joy, and happiness." (Ezra Taft Benson, Ensign, May 1980, p. 67)

We most definitely feel the promised influence of this great book when we make the time to read from its pages. After a summer of hit-and-miss scripture study, we are down to 100 pages with one month to go ... we can do it!

Do This More Often

Last night I did something really crazy: I invited a few of my favorite friends for dinner. My husband was overnighting it with the Scouts, tomatoes and basil were "on", and we girls had things piling up that needed to be talked about. Miracle of miracles, schedules cleared and at 7:00 we sat down at my dining room table, looked at each other increduously, and I, for one, started giggling inside.

As we passed bowls of salad and spaghetti Pomodoro, and ice-cold Izzes, we started catching up on a blossoming cupcake business, back-to-school supply deals, high school soccer try-outs, family vacations, and youth symphony. Dipping our garlic Pugliese led to dipping into deeper topics: family challenges, teenagers, where we each would like to be in a few years' time, and dream jobs. We soon side-stepped the deeper topics to share some of our most embarrassing moments EVER. This had me confessing aloud, hands pressed to my cheeks, while my friends roared.

After Natalie's homemade blueberry compote over vanilla ice cream, we watched the pre-recorded Brian Williams' Rock Center special on Mormonism. Having brilliant friends is really great, thought I, as we hashed through our likes and dislikes of the show.

Things I learned last night: women appreciate a pretty table and real napkins, girl talk is so necessary, Julie still makes the best salad around, women need to get together more often, and nothing is more cleansing than laughing really, really hard. Most importantly: with the unexpected twists and turns that life inevitably takes, having caring friends who believe in one another and champion one another is one of life's richest blessings.

Next time, your house???!

From Empty to Joyful in Thirty Minutes

So late this afternoon, I was driving home feeling a little bit empty and sad: daughter was off to a BBQ with friends and then the hometown football game, and doctor / bishop / handsome husband would soon be home from work to gather up his gear and set off for an overnighter with the Venture Scouts. I was going to be home alone with not much on my agenda: I had chosen what I thought was "the best" from a bunch of less-than-interesting movies at the local RedBox, and had brought a can of pumpkin in from the food storage with which to make a couple of loaves of pumpkin bread. Big thrill. Humph, and humph again.

Now it's nearly four hours later, and guess what? I've had the most wonderful evening by myself! And there's still a little more time before I pick up an SUV full of soaked-from-the-rain, excited teenagers ... so here I am, with you, to share what I learned tonight. Here's how I went "from empty to joyful" in thirty minutes flat.

1. Come home to quiet house, greeted by faithful Doodle, look around and see a bit of a mess. This I know about myself: I am not happy in a bit of a mess. I have two options: schlunk down into the mess and stay there for the evening, or take a few minutes to tidy up. Hey, I'm worth it!! Ah, Choice #1, taken by the horns and conquered. Tidiness it is.

2. Turn on all my pretty lamps as dusk closes in, and open the sliding door: cozy light inside, soft rain falling outside, fresh air creeps invigoratingly into my downstairs.

3. Light my incredibly yummy Beanpod (apple cider) soy candle. Instant Fall-in-a-Jar. Feeling better already.

4. Push "play" on my kitchen Bose: Jim Brickman's "Beautiful World" CD fills the room. Song 1 is "Simple Gifts", which always makes me feel at-one with the Shakers and all that is autumnal. Hum along, then sing along heartily: "'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free, 'tis the gift to come down to where we ought to be. And when we find ourselves in the place just riiiiiight ... 'twill be in the valley of love and delight."

5. Give the Doodle an unsolicited tummy rub. Kiss the top of his brown nose. Unless you're a dog lover, you WILL NOT get this. That's okay.

6. Start making a single serving of homemade hot chocolate on the stove. (2 T. cocoa, 2 T. sugar, dash of salt, 1 cup milk. Heat 'til steaming, and add 1/4 t. vanilla) Turn burner off when the call comes to be at the Crossroads for my daughter: grab the car keys, run to shuttle two cute 13 year-olds from making cookies at Kylie's to the BBQ at Mia's. Home again.

7. Finish hot chocolate, pour into my favorite striped mug, and spray a huge puff of whipped cream on top. Because I can.

8. A friend who never fails to inspire me phones. We talk for 16:38 minutes, and she tells me about her extraordinary experiences from last night. I feel as excited for her as if it happened to me. How I love having noble, Christlike women as dear friends.

9. Make a nest in my reading spot in our living room / library: soft blanket, new book, slippers, good reading light, move the candle in close ... start Ron Clark's The End of Molasses Classes -- 101 Extraordinary Solutions for Parents and Teachers. Oh my goodness. Amazing from page 1. If you are a parent, or a teacher in any sense, or a lover of young people (or all three), you will LOVE this book. Worthy of a blog post all its own. I have Brooke to thank for turning me on to this amazing educator who thinks out-of-the-box and accomplishes miracles with youth.

10. Handsome husband is home! Spring from my cozy spot to be at his Crossroads. Perch on the arm of the sofa in his office while he packs his stuff for the overnighter. After a grueling week of doctor and Church responsibilities, he is lighthearted and happy! This is a man who loves to "throw his pack together", grab a sleeping bag, change from work clothes to play clothes, and go make a difference with a bunch of young men. We catch up on the news of the day: an unexpected, sweet phone call from our daughter's History teacher, his report on this week's surgical procedures, update on phone messages from ward members ... all the while either he or I is/am running up and down the stairs, gathering his skull cap or his North Face gloves or his thick socks. Husband has transformed from doctor to outdoorsman, and after a quick smooch and a big smile, he's off to meet up with the priests' quorum. Feeling SO GOOD that I took the time to connect with him before he left. Love this man.

11. Read another chapter in Ron Clark's amazing book. Marking favorite words and phrases and whole paragraphs.

12. Start dinner for myself: one perfect, beautiful tenderloin steak slowly pan-fried in a tad of olive oil and herbs (then sliced thinly), a cup of fresh, steamed broccoli with lemon juice, and a small goblet of fresh-pressed apple cider.

13. Grab my inspiration notebook because suddenly the heavens have parted and phrases of illumination are coming fast and furious. Jot as fast as my hand can move. I have been praying lately about what my life needs to be about right now, where my time needs to be spent. I am brought back to C.S. Lewis' analogy of A LIFE as compared to either a cottage or a palace, and suddenly see exactly how that applies to me. My direction for this next phase of life comes in little snippets of light and whispered promptings. I am writing. I am getting it. I am joyful. I know what my next move must be, and it is exciting.

14. Eat dinner slowly, taking breaks to continue writing in my journal. Feel grateful that I took the time to be quiet tonight, rather than glueing myself to the TV. The Spirit needed to be able to get through. Feel the need to blog RIGHT NOW, after weeks of feeling less-than-inspired and so un-bloggy.

15. Grab my little camera, take an awkward photo of my reading spot (so you can have a visual image as you read), log onto blogspot, and type, type, type. The words pour out, and thirty minutes later, here I am typing this period. That one there.

One lesson from tonight: the emptiness and the poor-me feelings high-tailed themselves out of here the moment I made the CHOICE to set my stage to have a wonderful evening. Another lesson, re-learned: in order to hear the still, small voice of the Spirit, we need to make time to be quiet.

Well, my sweet followers, I have about thirty minutes 'til I'm on carpool duty again. Start that dumb movie? Nope. I have just enough time to get a couple loaves of pumpkin bread in the oven, then I get to hang out with the world's coolest teenager. Be back soon...